Enlustered


The Weak and Strong Nature of Man
August 31, 2014, 8:54 pm
Filed under: Human Potential

Perhaps instead of saying “god” and the “devil” it’s more accurate to say that there are two sides to mankind. One represents his stronger side and one represents his weaker side. The voice just mentioned something to me earlier about this and I wanted to post it because sometimes it does seem that the weaker side can take over. I think this world is testimony to that. The strong nature is independent in its actions. The weak nature is dependent on outside assurance and support. I feel I desire attention and interaction, but I am independent enough that if that attention is unfriendly or turns vicious in nature I can strike out on my own.

My interest in this topic also relates to me wanting to just simplify things I have said in the past about god being inside and the devil being outside. I feel that some voices I hear represent the weaker nature of man, like just a minute ago I heard a voice saying something like, “They need you to show them what to do.” I don’t feel that should be my focus or interest. I just have to worry about myself (focus “inward”) and do what I want to do and others will hopefully do the same (whatever that entails for each person). And that should be enough to set things right. Too much dependence on one person leaves everyone weak/insecure, unused, and just lamer and stupider-seeming.

Another influence of the weaker side: Sometimes I feel embarrassed (ya know embarrassed to scratch somewhere like my butt or pick a wedgie in public) and that’s a reflection of dependence on opinions and set ideas of how something can be seen without really looking at the inner processes. A human is just seen as defined by the outside opinion of the act as being gross and is almost no longer a human with a name, a personality, aura, etc.

I think the unpleasant feelings we have, like shame or worry (which involve seeing oneself as worthy of punishment or rejection), just revolve around the weaker nature and just the influence from the outside. A false influence because someone else’s opinion shouldn’t be more valuable than yours in your own life and because, yeah, you just can’t say someone else is right and you are wrong or some law of the world is right. That just takes the individual to figure out on his own and the individual just living on his own.

Anger, as opposed to shame and worry, revolves more around feeling worthy of the best, I feel in my opinion. A lot of times when someone feels he has no right to be angry it means he feels he deserves the punishment he gets. My recent comments on racism in school are new because previously I questioned whether blacks, including myself, really were dumb. Now that I know I’m not dumb I feel I have a right to be angry and see the situation as injustice, so I don’t suppress my feelings the way I used to over the situation that’s always made me angry, especially because I felt it was so taboo since it involved race and the idea that blacks were dumb. It took writing and figuring things out to give me confidence because with it I see things clearer and because I feel I am good at it, which makes it enjoyable. The kind of writing I do, I feel has been discouraged in devil whirl, at least as a form of income, and also because it is so informal at times, taboo and inappropriate (because I’ve always been so, so angry at white people and the world).



A Voice On Parenting And School Racism
August 31, 2014, 3:58 pm
Filed under: Human Potential

A voice said earlier something along the lines of (I wrote it after I heard it in full, so it’s not an “exact” quote, but very close): “A heart-to-heart with your kids about racism in devil whirl schools would really help, wouldn’t it, Marla? Yeah, but who does that when there’s no way to fix the problem other than to be who you really are?”



Fuck You, Fake Parent, Ya Dumb Bitch
August 31, 2014, 3:33 pm
Filed under: Human Potential

I really feel like I could punch some people in the face for being so fake and racist and taunting how white and married and having four kids they are. Sorry, but it’s annoying as fuck. So that makes ya dumb ass wurff somethin. So fucking stupid. I could just punch your dumb ass in the fucking face. That’s how I fucking feel ya dumb bitch. Fuck you and your kids. You already fucked them up the ass for sending them to schools that said they’re wurff somethin cause they’re white and they’re better den black kids and fur that they should hate yo ass, too. You fuckin deserve it ya dumb bitch, enslavin your own kids into being worth something that has (almost) nothing to do with who they really are inside, almost nothing because how they respond to being told they’re only worth something cuz they’re better than lowly black kids is a part of who they are, it’s a part of God, so that experience can help them see who they are, but they will get no guidance from you because you are totally fake about it. You are a tamed bitch. A racist who deserves to get her or his ass kicked.

Yeah, and you’re such a victim and so right now because I’m so wrong, so rude for saying EXACTLY how I feel. And you’re valuable for fucking yourself over and not giving a rats ass about how you feel cuz it’s too inappropriate. Betta hide dat shit so you can be wurff something. Yup, that’s exactly the kinda logic that made yo dumb ass ancestors lynch black folk. They’re language was vulgar then and their behavior, but guess what, they were JUST LIKE YOU. You know why? Because THEY WERE APPROPRIATE AS HELL THEN TOO, JUST AS YOU ARE NOW YOU DUMB BITCH WHITE RACIST. Appropriate FOR HATING THEMSELVES AS MUCH AS THEY HATED BLACKS, JUST LIKE YOU. FUCK YOU.



How I Roll
August 31, 2014, 3:20 pm
Filed under: Human Potential

Yeah, so I update a lot. It’s how I work. So what? It’s fun to keep fixing a post. I don’t know why. I don’t like to wait to publish stuff. Sometimes I feel like, hey, I’m not supposed to do this, but devil whirl is the one that’s so strict. In real life, it doesn’t matter. The only thing to avoid is doing stuff mechanically by rules you don’t really want to follow. I started a big long post yesterday that came as I just kept thinking of stuff to write, but it just got so big and I felt I still had so much more to say or to organize. That post will prolly never get published, but if I publish something right after I write it, it just gets done and it’s out there and I might fix it a lot until I move on to something else, but it gets published. Stuff I wait to publish doesn’t get posted. It stays in the draft section.



The Voice On Bumble Bees (Updated A lot)
August 31, 2014, 2:06 pm
Filed under: Human Potential

I was just wondering about bees, since the voice talks a lot about cows, including today, (and how they are fit to eat because they do not flee predators) but it never talks about bees, even though it often talks about “the land of milk and honey,” when it talks about the US.

I was wondering about bees and their significance since they fight back (unlike cows), and the voice said, “but honey is the way they attract people.” I think the voice is talking about how devil whirl suggests people approach others or interact “politely,” no matter how angry or irritated or frustrated you are.

In other words, devil whirl says to hide how you feel and be polite no matter what. Is this good for people to reject how they feel all the time? Everyone in devil whirl seems to think so, always correcting people (especially correcting black people in some of the comments sections of these YouTube videos I’ve been watching–ALWAYS! white people correcting black people) when they get upset or “raise” their voices. So lame. Stop the lame shit already, WHITE PEOPLE!

A super lame (I think) white woman tried to discourage me from using “racist” terms in comments I made on this video (in response to her questioning on blacks’ anger or tone. Her name was “12345corinne.” She called me a “house nigger” (because I was discussing the term after SOMEONE ELSE brought it up). She said she wanted to show me how it felt. Dumb bitch. I’ll say what I want. Devil whirl says its appropriate to insult people ONLY when IT”S COMPLETELY HIDDEN THAT YOU ARE INSULTING THEM, as it is when they report the test scores trying to say black kids are dumber THAN EVERY OTHER RACE A KIDS!

No one EVER commented on the segregation in the schools I went to in reading groups and academic levels of courses, black kids always being in the lower groups. I heard the message loud and clear, even though no one ever said nothing “impolite” or “rude” or “racist.” I knew I was dumb from a very young age from being placed in lower reading groups with other black kids and just not doing well in school all my life while I saw white kids do so well all around me (until college when I went to a BLACK school!).

In high school I sat next to a Indian kid who thought I was so smart in math class and had another white kid tell me how smart he thought I was in geometry, but I never heard that from any teacher–until college–and I flunked out of that math in class the Indian kid thought I was so smart in.

Those couple classmates (and my college advisor) just seemed like flukes. I found out devil whirl was wrong years later, maybe in my late twenties, I can’t remember, but it’s been a long life suffering from devil whirl CLOSET RACISM, the only racism whites want apparently, especially when people say “disturbing” things. I think it’s a good thing someone’s disturbed enough to say something “disturbing” about the situation in the first place. I think the thing that hurt me the most all my life was that no one seemed to give a damn about the racism I saw all around me and still see today, as whites seem completely oblivious and unconcerned AND RACIST as hell.

(ADDED 2:46 p.m.) I hated school really, it’s just irrelevant shit. That’s what’s wrong. No one wants to study that lame shit that has nothing to do with what people are interested in. Deep down black kids know that it’s pointless shit, but it just makes them feel dumb because it’s foreign (because it’s pointless) and because kids who don’t look like them do better.

I think they really suffer in school and give up a lot on stuff because they think they’re dumb. I worked with kids and I’ve seen them guess answers to questions or just not even do the “work” or steps for math problems when they’re in groups with Hispanic kids. It’s not always white, Asian and Middle Eastern kids who are favored. It’s all kids over black kids.

Also, the saying about attracting more bees with honey than vinegar is specifically about sugarcoating your grievances with people, i.e. hiding how you really feel from people to get what you want from them. That’s not polite or nice. That’s deception, the tactic of the devil, probably a key part a how he started dis mess called devil whirl. Here’s a blog post on someone’s experience with the saying (of catching more bees with honey) and why she thought it worked. I disagree with her, still, of course and think it’s not worth it to adjust yourself to get a preconceived “desirable” response from others.



Coiled Hair of Blacks
August 31, 2014, 1:41 pm
Filed under: Human Potential

“Your hair is the hair of those who would not give up their fight against the Lord and Savior Jesus Christ,” a voice just said.

Blacks, according to the voice, would not allow themselves to be crucified, apparently like the cow (I’ve been writing about in previous posts today) or Jesus, who in the story we’re told did not fight or reject those who crucified him. I think this is a lie that Jesus would NOT fight back and would use such great restraint. That’s not very human-like at all, it’s the behavior of someone who is indifferent, cold.

Why is it valued to not respond in anger to someone who believes you deserve to suffer and someone who is able to inflict that suffering with the approval of others? This is the way blacks are treated in this country. Others look at them and then past them, like they deserve to suffer at higher rates in prisons, in poverty, in higher diagnoses of schizophrenia, in oppressive neighborhoods with rules and signs and ideas expressed that blacks are dangerous, in schools that say they are less than because they score lower than white (and Asians and Middle Easterners and Hispanics) on tests created by whites, in segregated “alternative” schools populated mostly by so-called “violent” black boys.

Blacks are Jesus, they are the one the world hates for being so like God, for being so real and human, so… “inappropriate,” just like apparently (the symbol of) Jesus was. The story of Jesus, I believe is symbolic for the struggle of blacks. The details revealing that blacks were Jews and that Jesus was black (and probably married) were hidden. I know I spent all my life thinking Jews were white, but that’s not so according to the hidden truth.

Even the details saying that blacks were Jewish, I think is symbolic of blacks being most like God because they do not reject themselves or change themselves to something they are not so people will accept them. The world expects everyone to do that, be what they are not, to do what is NOT in their hearts to do, to love their enemy, for example, like they say Jesus did when he was crucified. That’s unnatural. Should we love the devil? This world does.

Back to the quote I started this post with: My hair is very kinky and coiled, very tight to the head and hard to stretch out. I guess it’s kind of traditional black people hair. There are different types, I don’t know why, but I’m thinking they are all symbolic for the same thing. Resistance to being straight-laced and “appropriate,” resistance to going the straight and narrow, like the tortoise in the story of the tortoise and the hare. Resistance to living a narrow life, like the white Christian Jesus who (at least officially) did not get married, not because he was rebellious, but because he was seemingly above being human and “holier than thou,” like Catholic clergy members who worship him and stop having sex, with seemingly disastrous results at times.

I hate when folk are too straight-laced. I hate it. I always have.

I have said in comments on other sites (like in comments on this video) that the hair and skin color of blacks reflects concentration of something, richness of something. They are not diluted (or deluded into believing Satan’s lies about so-called “good” and “evil”). Their hair is tightly coiled to the head. Their color is rich and dark, not lightened in the sun like some materials and apparently the skin color of the people of some other races who “adapted” to the environment (which just does not make sense).



No Views At All So Far Today
August 31, 2014, 1:23 pm
Filed under: Human Potential

I got no views today on the blog. Zero. It’s 1:20 p.m. Yesterday I only got a couple. Well, that’s according to the statistics counter. I don’t pay much attention to that. And, anyway, God doesn’t ask that you actively get people to view your stuff, I don’t think. All you have to do is love those who are near: yourself. Love yourself enough to do what you love. And that will bring those from afar. That’s a saying, I guess, seemingly from devil whirl, but there are some gems of wisdom here and there, sometimes not though. Even with this gem, I’ve altered it to fit this particular situation and I think this fit is really what is most important, especially considering that people NOT loving themselves is the very cause of devil whirl to begin with.

P.S. The voice is telling me to tell you I’m the savior come save us from devil whirl. Maybe I will put this on my about page because it always tells me to tell people and I’ve told before on Twitter and such and even here. Sheesh. Putting it on the About Page will make it more, idk, readily available.